Sunday, January 17, 2016

10 Self Coaching Questions to Help You Move Forwards

One of the best gifts you get from investing in a life coaching journey is the ability to self-coach yourself out of difficult situations to shift your mindset and move forwards with calmness and clarity.

Self-coaching questions are questions you ask yourself to bring fear and negative thinking to a halt, allow yourself to pause and ask yourself a question that activates new ways of thinking and new perspectives. 

These new thoughts shift your perception and help you see a situation from a multitude of sides and then chose which perspective or decision feels most empowering for you.

Without having these powerful circuit breakers, fear gets the better of us and we end up reacting to a situation emotionally which leaves us filled with shame, guilt, regret and dis-empowerment.

Having powerful questions to ask yourself in a moment of doubt, fear or dis-empowerment will help you break away from sabotaging behaviors and it is like having the voice of your life coach in your ear guiding you towards a good decision.

And each time you are able to make empowering moment to moment decisions for yourself, you will lift your confidence and self-respect.

So here are my top 10 SELF COACHING QUESTIONS I teach my clients to help them
move forwards from difficult situations.

  1. What would I do if I felt courage, right now? This question is designed to shake you out of fear, but instead of telling yourself to stop being fearful, your focus is shifted to courage and to help you identify how your decisions can be shaped by having courage
  2. What decision would I make if I showed myself self-respect? Instead of sabotaging yourself and giving in to emotion and addictive behavior, this question directs your focus towards self respect and helps you make decisions which increase self-respect which in turn increase self-worth.
  3. What if I had total trust right now? IIf emotion was laid out along a spectrum, Fear and trust would be at the two opposite sides. Trusting yourself and trusting in a higher power helps you embrace uncertainty, helps you be more present and resilient and trust holds your mental wellness like the trunk of a tree, holding you strong and centered.
  4. What is standing in the way of my success?I love this question. This question helps you gain awareness around what sabotaging or limiting behaviors, such us bad habits and negative thinking, are standing in your way.
  5. What/who is draining my energy? When you are able to catch the energy vampires and protect your energy field, you are able to stop others from draining you.

    Although we don’t realize this, it is so important, because the lack of awareness means we take on other people’s STUFF and lose our center and focus.
  6. How can I take my power back? Do you need to step back or speak up? Standing your ground and speaking up for yourself will give you your power back. Sometimes the same can be achieved in walking away as well.
  7. What is my truth and how can I speak my truth right now? Sometimes we get lost in who we need to be and how we can please others and in doing so we lose ourselves and what is our true authentic state. This question is designed to help align you back to you and what matters most to you. It allows you to put yourself first and empower yourself.
  8. How can I take charge of this situation? This question helps get you out of victim mentality where we withdraw in self-pity instead of taking responsibility. It stops you from hiding in the comfort of avoidance and procrastination and allows you to take charge and take the necessary action steps.
  9. What do I need to let go of to move forwards right now? Are you holding onto the past, holding onto negative belief systems or holding on to situations that are not bringing you joy?

    Living in the past or future will rob you from the joy of this present moment. So this question allows you to gain awareness around what you are holding onto and help yourself to let go and move forwards.
  10. Am I seeing this situation clearly; am I seeing things for the way they are? This question allows you to have compassion and empathy without just instantly taking things personally. The moment you take things personally you judge yourself and others and you define the situation by that judgment.

    Life is never one dimensional, there are always many different perspectives and scenarios happening at one time, so by asking yourself this question you can stop and observe all the dimensions of a situation and notice what is really going on.

    For example if a person is 
    criticizing you or putting you down, by stopping and noticing if you are seeing the situation clearly means you will now observe what else is going on for that person and notice that perhaps they are projecting their own fear or limitations onto you.

In order to experience the benefits of these questions, the key is to REMEMBER TO REMEMBER…remember to STOP and break the negative thinking and then replace that negative thought with a powerful self-coaching question.

Please let me know how these start to work for you!

To your truth and freedom with lots of love,

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