Jai has no construct of time, there is only now! No tomorrow, no yesterday, no next week, no in a couple hours… only now. When he is playing with something he is fully immersed in it (well, for a few precious seconds) and finds the joy in whatever he does. He doesn’t multitask or try and fit in as much as he can in one day, he is not focused on how productive he is being or if he is winning or losing…all he has is this very moment.
Oh yeah! By the end of Jai’s day he has stepped in some serious mud, picked up all sorts of dirt from the garden, whatever he has consumed is all-over himself, and he is sticky, sweaty and smelly. Yet it does not bother him and he has taught me to roll up my sleeves and get messy… roll in the mud , sink your hands in and embrace life.
At some stage we develop that awful disease to please and put others first over ourselves. But not the toddler…My needs come first, there is no disease to please or being a martyr.
Their needs come first and what they need matters. They do not second guess themselves or question their needs. They need and then ask…it’s very simple!
I often think I need to be doing more with him…take him to a play centre, the zoo, park etc …but his needs are simple and do not need to be complicated. His happiness is simple eat, s**t, play, sleep, enjoy the sunshine, have fun, be curious, find an adventure and explore!
Yes, there needs to be boundaries and guidelines and of course there needs to be safety rules, yet what makes him thrive is to bath him in love and kisses and lots of cuddles.
He will learn his way and discover his own lessons…all I need to do is love him unconditionally and let him know that he has a safe place to land no matter what! Unconditional love teaches us that we are valued and have unique gifts to offer the world.