Is Your Mind a Control Freak?

We have been conditioned to let logic and rational thought lead us. We always need to understand things or have them make sense. And as a result the mind has taken full control of our reality by becoming a Meaning Making Machine forever search for meaning and logic. 

We are forever judging, analyzing, criticizing and thinking. On a positive note we have developed an amazing logical  intelligence and desire to create more in our lives, but on a negative note we have created an over thinking, busy mind, analyzing and analyzing and analyzing, thinking and thinking and thinking whereby we are lost in the dramatic narrations replaying in our thoughts. We rarely have stillness in the mind and are rarely completely present and in the moment.

Have we given this Ego mind too much control? Do you know that you do not actually have to believe every thought you have? Do you know that in truth YOU ARE NOT YOUR THOUGHTS?

Over time our repetitive thoughts become conditioned thought patterns, and

these thinking patterns become our story or the internal dialogue which forever plays in our head. This story then shapes our perception of the world around us. This story becomes our reality. And we will defend or justify our stories at all cost because they symbolize what we know, and that knowledge gives us certainty. Our certainty builds our trust in the world and therefore our safety. So the Ego mind desperately holds on to its control of your thoughts in its attempt to protect you and keep you safe.

This explains why we build behaviors as a result of our thoughts. The Ego mind creates a comfort zone and those thoughts become part of our safety zone and we get stuck in a fearful reality…this reality becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Think about a person who has a fear of failure. Their story would go something like this…

Nothing good ever happens to me. I mess up everything and can never do anything right. I am so stupid and pathetic and wish I was more like other successful people.

If I was better looking then things would be better and I would not fail. If I was smarter I would be luckier. I never make the right decisions and don’t know how to trust myself. I will just fail at anything I try.

OK, maybe I've exaggerated it a bit (I hope so), but this failure story has created a Victim Mentality whereby they have made the decision to fail at whatever they do. They have literally programmed themselves to fail! They are full of self-pity, self-doubt and self-loathing. And all of those thoughts will result in feelings of anxiety and depression. 

This reality will have you living in the past or painfully anticipating or worrying about your future. You will never be in the now and will never have full control of your emotions because you have no control of your mind. You will forever be in a state of suffering.

Here are some thought patterns which will instantly create stress and anxiety within you:

• The need to control an outcome
• The need to control or change another person
• The need for validation or acknowledgment from others
• The need to prove yourself
• The need to be a perfectionist
• The need to forever check your social media, emails, phone etc.
• Judging yourself
• Being impatient and needing instant gratification
• Ignoring your gut instinct and letting the mind talk you out of things
• When you break personal boundaries or don’t even have them
•   Repetitive worrying thoughts of the future or replaying past events
• Interrupting others, speaking over others, or keeping silent

 (Any of those ring a bell? If you are able to check more then 3, know that your mind has way too much control over your thinking) the above thoughts represent a mindlessness reality. 

What if you were able to take back your power and be in control of your thoughts, your story and your reality? What if you came to realize that the quality of your happiness is determined by the quality of your thoughts? What if you decided to ditch the pity party and victim-hood and began to create an empowering and happy story?

Wouldn't life feel less stressful and overwhelming if you were in more control of your thoughts?

So, here is fantastic MINDFULNESS exercise to help you break your negative thought patterns and help you take back your control! This exercise will help you get out of your head and into your body. And most importantly it will bring you into the beautiful stillness and wisdom of your heart!

Begin to become AWARE of your thoughts. Listen to the narration of your inner voice. Identify the drama your mind is creating.

OBSERVE how those thoughts are making you feel. Mindfulness helps you deal with your emotions and let go of your thoughts, so begin to observe where in your body you feel those stressful thoughts.

Allow yourself to observe that feeling in the body with NON-JUDGEMENT. (This means you MUST NOT create a story, simply observe the feelings) This now means that you accept the emotions in your body and have stopped suppressing (or depressing) your feelings.

Begin to FOCUS on your BREATH and begin to soften and relax your body. As your breath lightens your body observe how the emotion is slowly beginning to dissolve. Everything in nature is impermanent. Everything changes and moves; nothing ever stands still. Like the ebb and flow of waves on a shoreline your emotions work the same way, so allow them to pass. As you relax, your emotions reduce and empty until you are left with a clear body and an empty mind.

Your mind no longer holds all the power- you are now able to be in control! 

AND THE RESULT…

Peace, calmness, happiness, joy and gratitude for everything PRESENT in your life in this very moment. Enjoy!

To your truth and freedom with lots of love,

Cheryne

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