Why do we need the Ego?

Why do we have an EGO?

This is a question I am always asked and always think about. Why do we have this negative side which holds us back,why do we keep ourselves small?

I was listening to a fantastic online class on Kabbalah the other night and they covered this topic which I thought was fascinating. I've been thinking about it all week.

Before we get into it, let me clarify what I mean by EGO? In my coaching model, which I am sure you know by now we have two sides of ourselves, we have our EGO and our ESSENCE. These two sides create a polar pull duality, which means they are constantly creating two opposing realities which exist in our consciousness at the same time. Reality therefore becomes whichever one we decide to follow.

Our Ego is the personality which is formed in childhood. The ego is created in reaction to our world around us and encompasses all our beliefs we see true about the world. The Ego forms our perceptions and decisions of what is best for us as the EGO's main goal is self survival. However, because the EGO is created as a reaction it is actually coming from fear, which is created in the mind.So our EGO is our fear and at the core we only have 3 core fears- I am not worthy, I am not good enough and I am not loved.

From these false perceptions we create our self esteem and self worth. And because this EGO perspective only views 1% of our reality we can see that if we live our lives through the drives of the EGO we will limit ourselves as we will only go as far as our belief system lets us go. The ego creates separation, confusion, instability, frustration, anger and feels heavy in the head.

Our Essence, on the other hand symbolizes our true nature. It is us minus our fear. The Essence is the blueprint of your soul and is made up of your core values. The Essence knows no fear as it is pure energy. It only understands purity and therefore is made up of wisdom, compassion, joy, courage, gratitude, respect and trust. These virtues are your higher intelligence which is ultimately your truth. Your essence is your full potential and is represented by an internal light which seems to guide us. When we are connected to our essence we feel light, we feel free, we feel empowered, strong, confident and proud.

We can therefore say that Essence and the Ego are the light and darkness

within us. Together they create what I call the Polar Pull Duality.

The Polar Pull Duality
We all feel it...the two voices continuously influencing us- one guiding us to our truth, one guiding us from our fear. Why do we need this duality and how can we find a point of balance?

The Ego is amplified when we give energy to it- we all know what happens when we self indulge in negative thoughts. We turn on the pity party and fall down the rabbit hole into a deep dark pit which some days feels impossible to get out of.

So why do we need this duality?

In order to feel fulfilled we need a challenge. If something comes too easily to us we tend to lack appreciation for it. When we are challenged we have a feeling like we earned it and so recognize the fragility of it.

Therefore the ego can be this challenge. From this perspective the Ego becomes a challenging force to direct us towards our greatness. Rather then becoming the ego we can observe our habitual behavior and take a pause to respond in a way which will empower us. Every time you challenge that habitual behavior you will grow and better yourself.

Key Points to play with!

• This requires mindfulness- you must be able to step back, pause and observe your ego behavior
• You must have the awareness of who you are in your higher self(your essence)
• You must have the tenacity, focus and will to change
• You must be prepared to feel the pain of the transition, because each time you feel pain it means you are outside your comfort zone and will therefore grow.
• You must be inspired and dedicated to be your essence.

With this focus you can shift your ego behavior and truly reach your full potential.  The Ego with this perspective becomes a powerful influence to challenge you to reach your full potential. Go for it...this is your birthright!

To your truth and freedom with lots and lots of love,

Cheryne

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